the luxury of Indian television viewing!

I wonder if it’s just me (it almost always is!) or has TV viewing these days become er…. How do I put it….rather…. Deciding what to watch on TV has become a somewhat daunting task.

I don’t mean to exaggerate here but, I DO have a tough time trying to decide what it is I’d rather have …my faith in -conjugal/courtship relationships shattered, expectations in family crushed, or look forward to live in the pure anticipation of parenthood!

If u don’t believe me let me illustrate the various dilemma’s I face, on a daily basis, but mind u I AM an optimist so I would like to call these( musings of mine) as strong and justifiable Reasons why today’s television makes u a stronger person!

Welcome to the foray of reality television ….where you will be exposed to

• Couples canoodling (and dipping their wicks into apparently willing pants) with partners other then who they are supposedly committed to.

……Builds character for the victim and the victor …!

•  A roomful of losers in their own fields who decide to stay in a house and fight over the most ridiculously “important” things.

  ….again builds character and strengthens interpersonal skills of the people involved, as they’ve been out of public attention for SO long, that they need it!

• A kid who decides after 15yrs of being with his folks “hmm schools boring …tried drugs, alcohol and sex…nothings doin it, Wait-a-minute (light bulb moment) lets replace the PARENTS, they are the guys who are clearly stunting my growth (pun intended)!!

……..I cannot stress this enough! Builds character of poor unwitting parents who are faced with new and improved tyrants to deal with.

• Random useless bloke signs up to (make an ass of himself) dating show in quest (THAT’S what keeps us going!) of finding a suitable mate to conoodle with temporarily after which he will be featured on the above mentioned series as a “comeback”

……goes to portray how much today’s youth will do to (get laid) find true love!

• Bunch of couples thrown on Goan beach to harass poor tourists and dress in the attire…shards of it, actually, whilst frolicking around performing “tasks” all the while either ditching one another on being given the choice of love / cash.

……builds bank balance!

• Woman fighting with other women in the family for attention of the one and only, centre of the universe the “man” this could be wife and sister in law, wife and mother in law, sisters in laws, co sisters  etc etc …

……Helps us learn words such as “bua, phuphi , nanand “ etc , builds vocabulary and illuminates how Not to do make up.

• 15 contestants vie to sit on the “hot-seat” and answer difficult questions posed by a legendary actor, but wait! That’s not all, The audience also gets a shot at making a million, by sms’ing answers (at 10rs a piece), to a given number resulting in all those involved in the production house winning millions!

…..increases general knowledge and the typing ability of sms participants enabling them to be potential competitors IF a competition were to be staged on quick typing

• Random , good looking ,apparently family oriented millionaire seeking heiress, with an advert like that you’d obviously get a fair few responses, 25 catty women “falling in love with” millionaire ,and he, after getting lucky with 3 of them, chooses none to marry.

…….helps us realize bachelor has cuter brother who’s now dating 3 out of the 25 women who were trying to marry the brother, re-instills “faith” in idea of love.

Apart from these the other options are limitless……..from reruns from a bygone era, Government Scams, Local area news (who farted in which part of town and which local corporator took immediate action), etc etc

Such is the luxury of Indian television!

HA ha! To all those who moved outta the country and cant afford cable there!! Who’s laughing now!